deceivable:

if someone came up to you and handed you a book and as you start reading it you realize that it’s a book about your entire life would you read it until the end?


He had thought more than other men, and in matters of intellect he had that calm objectivity, that certainty of thought and knowlege, such as only really intellectual men have, who have no axe to grind, who never wish to shine, or to talk others down, or to appear always in the right
Hermann Hesse, Steppenwolf

Juggling

a juggler in a circus

careless and free.

tossing and heaving,

living and breathing.

he cares not if one ball

may slip

it is but a 

colorful sphere

with no harm in dropping.

one by one he tosses

them into the air

keeping everything afloat

in perfect harmony.

Lately, I have become the juggler.

but alas, these balls I toss

are not harmless.

I juggle my cares, my fears,

my worries.

I jest with my friendships, 

my family, my success

in a hopeless attempt

to keep them all from dropping.


I am genuinely happy right now. I don’t know how long it will last, but right now, I’m just going to enjoy it.


Human connection is a weird thing. The way you connect so easily with some people and with others, no matter how hard you try… It just ne’er works. Or if you dont try. I guess personality is the actual weird thing here.


finals

i’m losing my mind. currently listening to country (which i normally hate) and studying like crazy for AP Euro.


lacking motivation.

as per usual


a haiku about stress

stress is killing me

why do i try so damn hard

i need a vacay



I can’t wait for tomorrow

So nervous. Big decision made in accordance with my past actions tomorrow. Just wish it would hurry up.


Feeling like I really fucked up today with something that’s really important to me. I need to improve immediatly.